The Jezza Chronicles - The FINAL Chapter
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The Jezza Chronicles - The FINAL Chapter
Steve: It’s over mate. It’s all over. The dream is dead.
Gail: Don’t talk like that, Steve! It’s never over! Do you hear? It’s not over! We can still make this work!
Jack: Now don’t be hasty Steve…
Steve: Stop telling me what to do Jack! I’m sick of you Jack! There! I said it! I finally said it! It’s your fault all this happened!
Gail: Steve! How could you say such a thing?!
Jack: Now listen No.2…
Steve: Don’t you No.2 me Jack! Don’t you No.2 me ever again! From now on I’m going it alone!
Jack: Steeeeeevie baby…c’mon. Don’t be silly. We still got posters mate!! There’s….there’s….um….there’s you mate, there’s me n’ Gail over there. Then there’s The General who seems a bloody nice chap, there’s Call…there’s Adam3, and not to mention all the Praetorians we have from all walks of life…
Steve: FUCK YOU AND YOUR PRAETORIAN BULLSHIT JACK! I’m not falling for it anymore!!! Where are these bastard Praetorians you keep mysteriously mentioning at 2am in the morning?! Where are they Jack? Tell me where the fuck they are ‘cause to this day I still haven’t fucking met any and I’m sick of waiting for this imaginary army of posters to appear and I’m sick of creating these damn fucking forums for you that nobody ever bothers posting on!
Gail: Steve!
Steve: Yeah…you can fuck right off too you bloody hanger on you. Yes Jack,..please Jack, three fucking bags full Jack…
Gail: Now don’t you…
Steve: Don’t you get it? Don’t either of you bloody get it?! Fen was our last chance to get those bastards back. She was our last chance and we blew it. Now what the fuck do we do? Shall we make Mars a fucking Immunis next so she can go and sponsor E.T the fucking Extra Terrestrial bastard as her partner?!
Jack: Steve. You can’t leave me.
Steve: I can do whatever I fucking please Jack!
Jack: You can’t leave me Steve because…because…omg I can’t believe I’m about to say this but what the hell…you can’t leave me Steve because I love you. I love you Steve. From the moment I laid eyes on you mate.
Steve: Ja…
Jack: It’s true mate. All these bannings I kept forcing you to carry out. It was jealousy mate. Couldn’t stand the fact you were giving other people attention. Used to drive me insane it did…
Steve: But why…
Jack: Why what Steve? Why couldn’t I tell you mate? I’m a Yorkshireman. Havin’ homosexshul tendancies where I’m from just isn’t the done thing. I couldn't do that to my family. I couldn't make them go through all that. People in our town have only just forgotten about Uncle Stanley ten years ago running off to Vegas with his donkey to get married...Funnily enough though, their two kids aren't half as ugly as one might have thought...
Gail: I thought you loved me Jack..I can’t…I don’t….
Jack: I’m sorry Gail. It’s Steve I love….
Steve: Jack…
Jack: Steve…?
Steve: I LOVE YOU TOO JACK!! I FUCKING LOVE YOU TOO JACK!!!
Gail: So where the fuck does this leave me?
God: Um...I'm still here Gail...
Gail: So you are. So you are indeed. lol. Who'd a thought? C'mon on then big boy...take me home!
The End.
Gail: Don’t talk like that, Steve! It’s never over! Do you hear? It’s not over! We can still make this work!
Jack: Now don’t be hasty Steve…
Steve: Stop telling me what to do Jack! I’m sick of you Jack! There! I said it! I finally said it! It’s your fault all this happened!
Gail: Steve! How could you say such a thing?!
Jack: Now listen No.2…
Steve: Don’t you No.2 me Jack! Don’t you No.2 me ever again! From now on I’m going it alone!
Jack: Steeeeeevie baby…c’mon. Don’t be silly. We still got posters mate!! There’s….there’s….um….there’s you mate, there’s me n’ Gail over there. Then there’s The General who seems a bloody nice chap, there’s Call…there’s Adam3, and not to mention all the Praetorians we have from all walks of life…
Steve: FUCK YOU AND YOUR PRAETORIAN BULLSHIT JACK! I’m not falling for it anymore!!! Where are these bastard Praetorians you keep mysteriously mentioning at 2am in the morning?! Where are they Jack? Tell me where the fuck they are ‘cause to this day I still haven’t fucking met any and I’m sick of waiting for this imaginary army of posters to appear and I’m sick of creating these damn fucking forums for you that nobody ever bothers posting on!
Gail: Steve!
Steve: Yeah…you can fuck right off too you bloody hanger on you. Yes Jack,..please Jack, three fucking bags full Jack…
Gail: Now don’t you…
Steve: Don’t you get it? Don’t either of you bloody get it?! Fen was our last chance to get those bastards back. She was our last chance and we blew it. Now what the fuck do we do? Shall we make Mars a fucking Immunis next so she can go and sponsor E.T the fucking Extra Terrestrial bastard as her partner?!
Jack: Steve. You can’t leave me.
Steve: I can do whatever I fucking please Jack!
Jack: You can’t leave me Steve because…because…omg I can’t believe I’m about to say this but what the hell…you can’t leave me Steve because I love you. I love you Steve. From the moment I laid eyes on you mate.
Steve: Ja…
Jack: It’s true mate. All these bannings I kept forcing you to carry out. It was jealousy mate. Couldn’t stand the fact you were giving other people attention. Used to drive me insane it did…
Steve: But why…
Jack: Why what Steve? Why couldn’t I tell you mate? I’m a Yorkshireman. Havin’ homosexshul tendancies where I’m from just isn’t the done thing. I couldn't do that to my family. I couldn't make them go through all that. People in our town have only just forgotten about Uncle Stanley ten years ago running off to Vegas with his donkey to get married...Funnily enough though, their two kids aren't half as ugly as one might have thought...
Gail: I thought you loved me Jack..I can’t…I don’t….
Jack: I’m sorry Gail. It’s Steve I love….
Steve: Jack…
Jack: Steve…?
Steve: I LOVE YOU TOO JACK!! I FUCKING LOVE YOU TOO JACK!!!
Gail: So where the fuck does this leave me?
God: Um...I'm still here Gail...
Gail: So you are. So you are indeed. lol. Who'd a thought? C'mon on then big boy...take me home!
The End.
El Guapo- Admin
- Posts : 2176
Join date : 2010-01-25
Age : 47
Location : Seated in front of PC
Re: The Jezza Chronicles - The FINAL Chapter
Funny El..........Really!!
Put a smile on miserable Winstons face!!!
Put a smile on miserable Winstons face!!!
Jimmy Saville- Posts : 438
Join date : 2010-01-27
Location : No idea. Lost again. This happens a lot dammit...
Re: The Jezza Chronicles - The FINAL Chapter
EL i hope you know that Steve, Jack, God and Gail won't like this......but those of us with a sense of humour think it's great, very funny and spot on.
Guest- Guest
Re: The Jezza Chronicles - The FINAL Chapter
Ahhhhhh, a happy ending el.. I soooooo love a happy ending..I'm filling up here *sniff*..no really..*sniff*..
Friggin A skelly man..
Dame Edna- Posts : 641
Join date : 2010-01-28
Age : 72
Location : Deep space 9.
Re: The Jezza Chronicles - The FINAL Chapter
Now that I'm done with the Chronicles though...what the hell am I going to write about now?! lol
El Guapo- Admin
- Posts : 2176
Join date : 2010-01-25
Age : 47
Location : Seated in front of PC
dolly- Posts : 548
Join date : 2010-01-26
Location : Dancin in her sparkly shoes! Boop de be doop yeh!
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