NEVER ENDING STORY....

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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  xtras on Sun Feb 07, 2010 10:52 am

.... and sped down the road to Guaps hut.Shocked....but something at the back of her mind kept saying "xtras xtras..", she knew she was the one for the job...reversing she hurried back to xtras modern apartment....and saw the lovely xtras walking into her apartment, Tammy parked the car and rushed to....
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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  El Guapo on Sun Feb 07, 2010 10:55 am

...the medicine cabinet to grab a mouthful of her pills. The Doctor told her to take them whenever reality began to become twisted and warped.

Munching on the pills in a frenzy Tammy slowly felt normality return and her crazy notion of asking Xtras for anything other than a cuppa tea dissipated.

El Guapo..she thought. Yes..he's certainly the man. So off she went...
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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  Dame Edna on Mon Feb 08, 2010 8:18 am


..in search of da man, who usually has a plan. Rolling Eyes It took her quite a while to get to El's gaff, it being the other side of london. Traffic was bad, as usual, and in the distance she could see an accident had happened! As she neared a cop waved at her to pull over. "Sorry miss, you cant come through here theres been a terrible accident".."But but but, she stammered, I have to get to El's, hes gonna help me kill off some folk"..oops affraid she thought as...
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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  xtras on Mon Feb 08, 2010 10:03 am

...as the copper gave her a strange look...."eh hehe.." she flustered, "i'm rehearsal for a play i keep saying out loud my lines..."..she stuttered..
"wow really"..smiled the young copper, "i'm a member of the local Amateur Dramatics Club, so what's this play your rehearsing then....?".....he leant down into the cars window, all ears, as she said......
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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  Dame Edna on Mon Feb 08, 2010 11:10 am


...errrr...Angels and Demons! I'm a devil and have o kill some folk. And I really have to get to rehersals, cant i just squeeze through the cordon? Pweeeze, pretty pweeze?? Hmmmm, thought the cop, shes a bit tasty and asked for her number. Tammy gave it, well, the number of the local undertakers actually, and off she drove. A few miles on she came to block of flats where El lived. Causiously she made her way up....
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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  El Guapo on Mon Feb 08, 2010 12:14 pm

...past the hordes of beautiful semi naked young girls all desperate for a glimpse of the sexy corpse. She reached a large door with a big gold star painted on it and knocked.

The door slowly opened and...
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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  Dame Edna on Mon Feb 08, 2010 12:41 pm


...and a rather large lumpy faced woman said, " Vat do you vant?" Shocked Tammy was quite shocked, as she'd never seen such a face as this! affraid "Errrr, is el in?", she nevously whispered. EEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLL, shouted the woman, you're wanted...and opened the door wide and gestured Tammy go in. A shadowy stumpy figure was approaching down the hall, and Tammy saw it was....
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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  xtras on Mon Feb 08, 2010 12:47 pm

.... none other then the late great ********, Tammy held her hand over her mouth as the smell coming from him was too much too bear,....she stood there sweating and shaking, as the figure stood toe to toe with her she looked up....... Shocked
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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  Dame Edna on Mon Feb 08, 2010 2:42 pm


...and a set of green, slimey fang like teeth were set in a horrible smile! What a Face hello my dear, and what can i do for you, the fellow said as yellow drool slid from the corner of his mouth. This put Tammy in a right and as she tried to answer....
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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  Uncle Fred on Mon Feb 08, 2010 3:33 pm

.."I'm looking for El! Have you seen him?!"

At this point, a rather attractive woman walked over to Tammy.

"Hello my dear," she said in a soft, kind and comforting voice. "I'm Unkie Fred. I can see you are distressed. Is there anything I can do to help? Any women's problems you want to chat about? Any nasty niffs coming from anywhere? Unexpected leakages? You can tell me sweetheart..."

Tammy stared back in horror. Slowly she...
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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  xtras on Tue Feb 09, 2010 12:56 pm

....thought "omg has my mum been in touch with that nutter unkie, about my problem, i'll kill her.."...she backed out of the door run down the stairs...took her mobile from her bag and rang her mum....grrrrrrrrrrrrr
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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  Guest on Tue Feb 09, 2010 1:36 pm

El walked into the room full of semi naked girls and soon found he had an extra bone he never knew he had before. H edged his way to the other door when suddenly another hand touched his it was...

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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  Guest on Tue Feb 09, 2010 1:48 pm

Natalie a blonde bombshell, she patted his hand and looked him over smiled and said 'would you like me to give you a hand, don't be nervous we're all friends here........

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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  El Guapo on Tue Feb 09, 2010 1:50 pm

El smiled at her and replied "No dear, it's ok. I have two attached already and another 5 spare ones in the garage.I could...however, use a couple of Molars if you have any handy?"
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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  Guest on Tue Feb 09, 2010 1:53 pm

Natalie led El by the hand, through the door to a small room, once in the room she locked the door behind her and.....

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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  xtras on Tue Feb 09, 2010 2:04 pm

...revealed, to el..that natalie was really undercover policeman,..anthony hopwood,.."you do know that what you have here is.."
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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  Guest on Wed Feb 10, 2010 2:22 am

a ladyboy who has loved you from afar for a long time El now it is time to give in to my lust, Xtras is outside keeping watch so we won't be disturbed. Just then in the nick of time the door opened and......

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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  Dame Edna on Wed Feb 10, 2010 4:22 am


...and in flew Tammy, out of breath and gaspingly whispered, " Did i leave a package here?" The ladyboy jumped when he/she heard Tammy and went all hysterical" who are you, he/she screeched? get out, get out!!!" while desperately trying to cover his/her....
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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  Guest on Wed Feb 10, 2010 4:31 am

Face, Is that the package over there, the one that is ticking said El, The lady boy ran for the door and disappeared without even a glance back. El wiped the sweat from his brow, Tammy grabbed the package when suddenly it......

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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  xtras on Wed Feb 10, 2010 12:02 pm

....stopped ticking,..Tammy looked at El..El looked at Tammy,.. together they looked at the package,...Tammy placed the package in El's out strectched hands......he looked down....and heard Tammy's footsteps, as she left the room...leaving him too.
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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  Dame Edna on Wed Feb 10, 2010 1:31 pm


...to think what to do with it!(thinking has never been an activity hes indulged in though) Very Happy I know, he said, I'll chuck it out the window! Very Happy Damn, he shouted, who painted the frames, the window wont open its stuck! Evil or Very Mad Oh yeah, he sheepishly muttered. Embarassed The package was growing heavy in his out stretched arms, when all of a sudden it....
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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  xtras on Wed Feb 10, 2010 1:39 pm

.....it started to vibrate in his hands...erm he thought, "is this the new transformer kit . has the same sort of vibrating motion like my one at home.."..he began to open the package..
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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  Guest on Thu Feb 11, 2010 7:50 am

Inside was a letter which said property of Xtras, El gently pulled back the paper and found......an alarm clock, thats why Xtras is always late El thought, El took the clock out of the box and saw a letter in there addressed to Xtras from........

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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  Guest on Thu Feb 11, 2010 10:36 am

.. the staff at SOL, praising her on her admin capabilities. "OMG! I've been fooled!", cried, El Guapo, "She always was an innocent in my eyes, and now I find out she deceived me!?".
As he cast his eyes over the letter, he couldn't believe what he was reading - for it asked if she had found out anything about El Guapo and his RL! "Why should SOL be interested in what I do outside of my work or forums that I write on", thought he...

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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

Post  Dame Edna on Fri Feb 12, 2010 5:42 pm


...and quickly screwed the letter up and tossed it in the fire. Hmmm, he was now in a bit of a delema. If xtras has already spilled the beans, and told sol he wasnt a high class Lawyer as he maintained, but was in fact a shelf filler at tescos! This could be serious, he thought.If my mates up the Conservative club knew i was a fraud they'd black ball me! Nope, only one thing for it, xtras will have to be...... affraid
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Re: NEVER ENDING STORY....

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